The past week

Hopefully I am doing all of this right... Well this past week has been full of so many emotions, most of which are good.  I can't express how overwhelmed we both are with the outpour of love and support not only from friends and family but even individuals we don't really know or haven't seen in years.  I've been asked a few times, what if it doesn't work?  I have to be honest.. if all we worried about is the what ifs, we probably wouldn't be this far along.  On Friday we will sit down with Dr. Allon and discuss all of our test results.  They will go over my ultrasound, all my blood work along with Thomas' dreaded semen sample and blood work.  I got to babysit our good friends little boy and it was so great to see Thomas wanting to hold him and help with him.  We've had a hard time really getting close to little ones, especially when we found out I wouldn't be able to carry.  In the beginning I was mad, hurt and full of so much negativity.  I had to do a lot of soul searching as I call it and really turn to God to get me through all of the ways I was feeling.  I've had to learn that he has perfect timing in all that he does and it's not really our plan, it's his.  Many people have reached out to us who also are having to go through fertility.  I have to tell people, please do not feel sorry for us because there is nothing to feel sorry about.. Lacy and Paul have blessed us with an opportunity that some couples will never be able to have.  Of course, I would be lying if I said I don't wonder what it would feel like to have a baby growing in my tummy, or to have Thomas feel my belly for the first kick.. but that just wasn't in the cards for us and that's okay!  I plan to embrace every minute along this journey and not worry about what might happen or what if?  God has done so many great things for us and just the fact that we have this opportunity is amazing and if we get a child out of it, that's just the added bonus.  Please feel free to ask questions because I would rather someone talk to us, to our face than behind our back.. as most of you know I am an open book, and Thomas- well Thomas is getting there!!   Please excuse any grammar mistakes, as when I start typing fast that all usually goes out the window!